20080212

hello all, everything in life's a farce

i didn't intend it that way, i'm sorry i feel damn bad shit about it.

when you don't mean it it turns out to be something when you mean it it turns out with nothing. i never thought of it that way it was like all crap and quite superficial and then it turns out to be as if _______, we just have to act in a certain way to seem right, so i think i should be more superficial than i already am? cause for every person you have to treat them differently and act differently

trust no one in the world yes, yes, yes it's never right to trust anyone even when you think you are right

it's really hard to know how you act in front of people though and i feel so sick of it but i guess i have to do that all my life because it kind of just reconfirmed it

it's always wrong even when you think it's right cause i'm stupid and lousy and i do all the wrong things in life anyway

well ok maybe all that above's meant only for stupid and dumb and lousy people like me.

but i don't blame anyone, except for my own stupidity. but sometimes i wonder if the world should be a bit kinder to stupid people of my type.

but i'm really sorry anyway):/

i finally understand what it means by being sick of life, or at least for now i feel sickest of life than i have ever felt

ok if i don't stop writing ______ here i'll never end and it will never make sense so i shall continue somewhere else.

i love the world, really(: